I got to be on TV!

I got to be on Studio 5 this morning, and it was a lot of fun. Those type of things have never made be nervous. I got to do some commercials as a teenager for ZCMI, too. That was fun.

I really think interviews for the newspaper make me more nervous, because you never know how they're going to tell the story.

Anyway, it was a lot of fun.

The real diet update

I went to the clinic today, where they tested my body fat to lean body mass composition. I have lost 12 pounds of body fat--woohoo! When I started this diet one month ago, I lost a lot of water weight during the detox phase. Since then, I've lost only four more pounds, but it looks like I've lost more fat and gained a little more water. I'm ok with water. Also when I started, I had 9 percent excess body fat; I'm now down to 3 percent excess. Very cool.

The trick to burning the fat, apparently, is in the ratio of protein ingested versus carbs. To continue my weight loss, they've got me on a 3 to 1 protein to carb ratio for meals (and all carbs have been vegetables or greens), with a fruit snack in the morning and an equal-ratio protein to carb snack in the afternoon.

My target weight has been pegged at 166 pounds. I currently weigh 173 pounds (down from 183 at the start), and my clothes are starting to fit pretty loosely. They were getting really snug. I told them at the clinic that I would like to weigh 155, but I'm thinking 166 is sounding pretty good. We'll see. I've never been a scale watcher, and people have always told me I look great, even at my heaviest. But I am feeling healthier and healthier. Now if I could just get this darn cold to go away...

Diet update

I go in for my checkup Monday, but I just wanted to give a quick update. A more thorough update is forthcoming, after my checkup. Ten pounds since March 6, with six of those lost in the detox phase, which was the first five days. That's just about a pound a week, which I think is sustainable. And still, no cravings for sugar. I have a chocolate (or two) here and there, and even made some cookies the other day, but overall I feel really good. I enjoyed the cookies, but didn't eat the whole batch in two days, like I normally would. They made me kind of sick, if you want the truth, even with whole wheat flour and half the sugar. Let's hope that sticks.

I purchased a couple of South Beach cookbooks, and will shop for the ingredients tonight. Yum. I can hardly wait to try some yummy new recipes. I'm also enjoying emailing back and forth with three of my sisters what we eat for the day. Beth, you wanna play?

What's in a name?

I got bored today, or something, because as I was flipping through my facebook friends, I wondered which of all my friends' names would appear the most. I know, I know--you don't have to say anything. The winners are:

Brian
Gary (one with 2 R's. Still count?)
Matthew
Michael (one Mike)
Paul
Todd

There were three of each. No women? Weird. I guess if you count me, there are three Lindas. Cool, huh?

On another, totally unrelated note, the last time I visited my hairdresser she told me she "like[d] my natural highlights." Guess it's a good thing I didn't color all of those grays, huh?

A time for reflection, a time for love

I have been asked to speak in my ward this Sunday, on of all things, reactivation. To those of you who are members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, that word means something specific. For those of you who are not, reactivation simply refers to members who have started coming back to church after not coming for some period of time. Active=going and participating; inactive=not going or participating. There are varying levels of both.

For those of you who may not know much about me, I have always been a member of the LDS church, but was "inactive" for about 17 years. During that time, I met and married my wonderful husband, Ed, and we had 2 beautiful sons. If there's interest, I'd be glad to post about my "re-activation," but for time's sake, I'll defer that story for now.

Suffice it to say that I guess because I've been both inactive and re-activated, they saw me as a good candidate to speak on the subject. I guess so, but all I really know is my personal experience. I cannot speak for others who have decided to leave the church. Everyone has their own personal experiences, reasons, problems, life choices, etc. that may or may not lead them to that decision. However, I agreed to speak.

As I've thought about this assignment/topic, two words kept coming to mind: love and choice ("agency," for those who speak the nomenclature). The two things that have stood out to me most as I think about this topic are, that first and foremost, we need to love our neighbors, period. There can be no, "Gosh, if I treat this neighbor kindly enough, maybe they'll come back to church." They'll see you coming, guaranteed. Secondly, even if we learn to love our neighbors "in spite of" their choices (this is said tongue in cheek, because I really feel strongly about it), they still have just that: the right to choose. And it is their choice. And again, they will see you coming.

Let me quote from my brother here, who posted this on his web site, and I think it's beautifully written. He's talking about his experience serving in the bishopric of his ward:

"I found that I loved conversing with people about the things that were most important to them, and above all I learned that when it comes down to it, people just want . . . to be loved. And that is what Christ provides for us all--love. The Atonement is an act of perfect love and enables us to spread the love of Christ to all. We can love and serve, and if we love and serve, eventually the Father's plan will be carried out. Love and service coupled with an understanding of our purpose can enable us to achieve amazing things that benefit us as individuals, our families, our neighbors and society in general. Not surprising that that is how the Father works."

Beautiful, and simple. Really, it is. The gospel plan really is stunning in its simplicity. As I thought about this topic, the Lord--in His tender mercy--opened for me Doctrine & Covenants section 4, where I found the following (I've left the scriptural cross references embedded because it was easier than removing them all):

"For behold the field is white already to harvest; and lo, he that thrusteth in his sickle with his might, the same layeth up in store that he perisheth not, but bringeth salvation to his soul;
"And faith, hope, charity and love, with an eye single to the glory of God, qualify him for the work.
"Remember faith, virtue, knowledge, temperance, patience, brotherly kindness, godliness, charity, humility, diligence.
"Ask, and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened unto you."

As I read this passage, it occurred to me that it's all right there, specifically in verse 6. Besides the words I chose (love and choice), think about it: faith, virtue, knowledge, temperence, patience, brotherly kindness, godliness, charity, humility, diligence. Living and embracing any of these qualities by themselves will certainly make us a better person. But altogther? Prepare yourself to be translated! Ok, kidding on that part. But seriously, if we endeavor to embody these attributes, it will cease to be about "reactivating" our neighbors, and start to be about loving them. In the purest sense. And once we love them purely, our ability to serve them will increase, which in turn might just change all of our lives.

I look forward to speaking on Sunday. I love the fact that people were in certain places at the right time to touch my heart in such a way that I was open to coming back to church. I know that there were many who helped me along that path. I am happier, more peaceful, and more grateful now than at any time in my life. I attribute that to my membership in the LDS church, which I hold dear.

If you want the simple answer as to what changed my mind, I would guess it's the same or similar for everyone: an answer to a prayer. I've often contemplated that that is really the only difference between those who know and those who don't. Maybe it's the case, maybe not, but for me it is.

A side note about my husband. He is not a member of the church, which does not matter to me. I have had moments where I've struggled with that, but ultimately it comes down to the fact that I love him, period. He has expressly declined any work being done for his parents, and he has told me up front that when he dies, he doesn't want any work done for him. I totally respect that. And I love him. He's one of the few people I know who truly embodies many of the attributes listed above. And I've even had to tell some ward friends and familyto back off and leave him alone. He's made his choice, and he's entitled to it. After all, pure love is pure, and agency is the greatest gift of all. This little exercise has been a good reminder for me, so if that's what this has been about, then I'm grateful.

So, regarding reactivation, it is my proposal that we all love our neighbors even if they choose not to come back. Are you ready for that? If you are, get on board. There's lots of lovin' out there to be done. Join me.

Dieting: more difficult than being overweight?

Yes. A resounding yes. Of course, if being overweight was difficult, far less people would be overweight, right? I realized many months ago that I was experiencing the "obesity creep," wherein you slowly gain weight over time, not realizing what's going on until you have to start buying all new clothes, and you just can't quite do all the things you used to be able to do.

I could blame the situation on anti-depressants (and have), but that's kind of a copout. So I finally decided to do something about it. Not being one to try things timidly, I jumped in with both feet--went to a weight-loss clinic and everything. I learned quite a bit, and the first five days were the "detox" phase. I lost six pounds, but it about killed me. Now that things have leveled off, I'm still gradually losing, but maintaining my sanity. :) I'd tell you how much I've lost, but we don't have a scale at home, so I'll have to keep you posted monthly, as I weigh in. Most people say, "But you look fine! Why are you trying to lose weight?" Well, when you're 2 sizes bigger than you were three years ago, it's time to evaluate where you want to be in another three years. Certainly not another 2 sizes bigger.

Some things I learned: soda is the biggest problem for most overweight people. I don't drink soda, so score one for me! One less thing to give up. The other big deal is not eating breakfast. Not a problem here, either. I always eat breakfast. What I did learn for me, is that carbs take way fewer calories to digest than protein, so I am now on a high-protein diet to kick in the metabolism, and it's working. I had worries about my kidneys and all that, but if I stay up with the required water and fresh veggies intake, I do fine. There have been, however, some other, unforeseen side effects. Once I lose the weight and reach my goal, I should be able to increase my carbs and revert to a "normal" diet. I.e., a more healthy one than before, which for me means leaving alone the sweets!

Here are the drawbacks I've experienced:
Drier skin. In fact, everything feels drier. Hair, nails, eyes, everything. Solution: increase the olive oil intake. Check. Doing better.

Destruction of good flora in the intestinal tract. Solution: start eating plain yogurt as my afternoon snack, instead of a cheese stick. Check. Doing better.

Cold sores. Solution: start taking L-lysine. Check. Doing better.

High metabolism means less sleep. The energy your body can generate is amazing. Still working on a solution to this one. :)

So, there are the cons to dieting. The pros? Still losing weight, and am actually able to wear a pair of pants today that I haven't worn in over a year. Plus, I don't crave sweets anymore. Not in the least. Give me an orange or grapefruit or apple or pear and I'm in heaven.

Is it worth it? I'll let you know when I'm back on a stable diet (I'm thinking South Beach. I ordered their cookbooks yesterday). Maintaining the weight loss will be key, and I certainly hope that I won't have endured all of this for naught. Wish me luck.

Best present ever

I turn 40 on Tuesday, and I'm actually looking forward to it.

For those of you who know Ed, you might know that he is really good at surprises. I can honestly say that he has surprised more times than not over the years, and has always been so in tune. I just love him.

A bunch of co-workers and I had gone to lunch to belatedly celebrate Bart's birthday, and it was really nice. Marilyn informed me at lunch that Richard wanted to meet with me that afternoon about some project (she didn't know what) and said she had sent me an appointment. After we got back, my friend and co-worker, Brian, came by to have me proofread some of his work. I didn't think twice about it, as he has me do that stuff all the time.

While reviewing it, I got a call from Jeri Deneen to go over some signs that we've been working on. I told Brian I had to take the call, and he left. After a few minutes he popped his head in my office and told me to come to the lunch room when I got a minute. Marilyn had called a few minutes before my appointment with Richard to tell me he was on the phone and that she would call me when he was off. So I figured going to get whatever treat was in the lunchroom would take just a minute and I could then meet with Richard. Because honestly, why else would Brian tell me to come down to the lunch room?

I started down the hall, and Brian was standing outside the lunch room with Marilyn. I thought to myself, "That's a good sign if Marilyn's here- Richard must still be on the phone." But then, she darted back in the lunch room and Brian got quiet. I knew something was up at this point, but I was about 5 feet from the door. I asked Brian what was going on. He just said, "Come in here."

Almost everyone from the admin building was in the lunch room and there were black balloons everywhere and I just couldn't take it all in. I started crying. I couldn't believe my co-workers would have a surprise party for me! As I looked around I was just amazed, and then I noticed my parents in the corner. I said, "My Mom and Dad are here!" As I walked over to them, somebody said, "and your husband!" Then I knew. He had really outdone himself. It was perfect.

I hugged Mom & Dad, and gave Ed the biggest hug ever. Again, it was perfect. I'll download the pictures and post them here, although I think most of it was video, which I'm not sure how to post. It was so much fun. One cake said, "You're older than dirt" and had cake crumbs on the top. What a nice surprise. I LOVE surprises.

A funny note: I hugged everyone in the room, starting with the women. Brian HATES hugs, but he hugged me anyway. It was pure torture for him, I'm sure--especially with everyone watching. I got around to Perry, and he asked, "Will your husband be jealous?" I cracked up. Not Ed.

Way to go, honey. I think I'll keep you. :) Thanks for the best present ever.